The journey

Sometimes the most important thing we can do is to take that step, to begin our journey, to just do it. The journey awakens the soul.  |  Mark Nepo

Lately I am thinking a lot about my life. My journey. And I really have a feeling I am ready to take the new big step. To open new door, open my heart. To something new, something bigger. Maybe something that has been with me for a while. Something that I dreamed of and that is already in my heart. And at this point I ask myself a question: What is keeping me from taking that step? It is so nice to be in our comfort zone, enjoying the things and doing them in the safe way. It is easy to do the things in your own habit. And feeling comfortable. But that is not the point of our life. The true magic is getting out of our comfort zone. And this is where the miracles happens. At this point I just look into the eyes of my fear and I face it. And when I do I grow. Grow into what I was meant to be. Into better me.

In December my yoga teacher read us from Book of Awakening (Mark Nepo) at our yoga practice. It’s one of my favourite books lately. Spiritual daybook. Guidebook for a soul journey.

And here I share the 9th of January story:

“It was a curious thing. Robert had filled the bathtub and put the fish in the tub, so he could clean their tank. After he’s scrubbed the film from the small walls of their make-believe deep, he went to retrieve them. He was astonished to find that, though they had the entire tub to swim in, they were huddled in a small area the size of their tank. There was nothing containing them, nothing holding them back. Why wouldn’t they dart about freely? What had life in the tank done to their natural ability to swim?

This quiet yet stark moment stayed with us both for a long time. We couldn’t help but see those little fish going nowhere but into themselves. We now had a life-in-the-tank lens on the world and wondered daily, In what ways are we like them? In what ways do we go nowhere but into ourselves? In what ways do we shrink our world so as not to feel the press of our own self-imposed captivity?

Life in the tank made me think of how we are raised at home and in school. It made me think of being told that certain jobs are not acceptable and that certain jobs are out of reach, of being schooled to live a certain way, of being trained to think that only practical things are possible, of being warned over and over that life outside the tank of our values is risky and dangerous. I began to see just how much we were taught as children to fear life outside the tank. As a father, Robert began to question if he was preparing his children for life in the tank or life in the uncontainable world.

It makes me wonder now, in middle age, if being spontaneous and kind and curious are all parts of our natural ability to swim. Each time I hesitate to do the unplanned or unexpected, or hesitate to reach and help another, or hesitate to inquire into something I know nothing about; each time I ignore the impuse to run in the rain or to call you up just to say I love you – I wonder, am I turning on myself, swimming safely in the middle of the tub?”


I started 2016 with going with the flow, being curious and kind. Enjoying every single moment. Enjoying every single snowflake. Enjoying every single breath I take. <3

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